Saturday, May 26, 2007

And the monsters are crazy.



I went to see Em Thursday and Friday.
List:
I hung out for a few minutes in her cube while she showed me pictures of Sophie and Leo and Rudy. There was a photo of Sophie all around the office and she's lookin pretty rough. Her hair is all scraggly like an old woman in a home. She was also wearing about 5 collars each with a box. Em explained that these are absolutely necessary for the electronic fences/doors. Poor Soph... (Em just sent me the photo)





then we watched Lost with Patrick who I think was frustrated that I'm so behind. I kept asking questions about what was happening and he desperately wanted to tell me, but he didn't which makes me love him.
then we ate tons of vegan nachos, fiesta burgers, whoopie pies, & brownies (http://www.thevspotcafe.com/) (oh and by we, I mean I ate everyones food)
then Em gave me tons of Clinique and Estee Lauder products that she has stashed in her closet. It was better than Christmas. "Bath salts! What?! Do they get in your you know???"
then we stayed up til 3:30 AM singing along to Annie Lennox
Em left for work at 8 and I slept in til 10:30.
then I ate more nachos and watched Rob & Big
then I met her downtown
We had lunch at Mayrose with some of her young and hip urban co-workers (Em had a salad, I had the chili and it was really good, and we both had sweet potato fries)
then we went to H&M with some coupons Em had from work. She almost bought a bra strap headband but decided against it and we left with nothing because we don't spend money on clothes, ever.
Then we went back to the house and cried some more.
Then Em went with me to Chinatown to get my bus. Everyone was screaming at me and I was running around like a chicken until they corralled us onto the stinky hot unmarked bus. A 90 year old lady got off the bus in Cherry Hill when we stopped. One of her family members had to run and catch her before we left her in Jersey. I don't understand how she even opened the door. The trip home was very entertaining.
Then I walked to the house from Chinatown, stopped at Lazaro's for some garlic knots, and fell asleep on the couch starring at my new cruelty free make-up.

Thanks Em.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

what I do at work now.


May 21, 2007 8:45 AM
Flag as Spam or Report Abuse [ ? ]
Subject: "Can you answer 50 questions about your # 1 friend? I'm bored.
Body: DON'T change your top friends, and answer 50 questions about the 1st person in your top friends.

1) What's their name?
willy b

2) Does he/she have a girlfriend/boyfriend?
hehe

3) Would you go to Disneyland with them?
no

4) How old were you when you first met?
13

5) Has he/she ever tried to hump your leg?
probably

6) Is this person older then you?
no

7) When`s the last time you saw this person?
8:41AM

8) When was the last time you talked to them on the phone?
Friday

9) Are you related to this person?
no

10) Are you their b/f or g/f?
no

11) Do you have a nickname for each other?
bengay, linbad, stinky

12) Do you have pics of this person on your myspace?
yes

13) How many times do you talk to this person?
a lot of times?

14) Do you think they will repost this???
no

15) Could you live with this person???
yes

16) Why is this person number one on your top friends?
he whined about it

17) Have you seen this person cry?
never. ever.

18) Do you know this persons middle name?
benji

19)Have you ever been to the mall with this person?
outlet mall

20) Have you ever had a sleepover with this person?
yeah and i got punched

21) If you ever moved away would you miss this person?
yeah for like a week

22) Have you ever gave this person something?
huh? a friendship bracelet that i secretly took back because it was on the floor and gave to david. who then broke up with me.

23) Have you ever done something really stupid or illegal with this person?
maybe?

24) Do you know everything about this person?
i'm nosey

25) Does this person have a job?
ivy league

26) Does this person have you as their #1?
probably because i cried

27) Do you think you and your #1 will be best friends forever?
forever and ever and ever

28) Have you ever made something with this person?
a penis book, a david bowie cover, a lot of photo shoots

29) Have you ever taken myspace pictures with this person?
yes professional ones.

30) Have you and your #1 fought before?
a lot of punching and biting

31) Is your #1 on drugs?
i wish

32) Does this person drink alcohol?
like a fish

33) Whats your #1's favorite food?
i can't tell. rice and beans?

34) Have you and your top person made up a hand shake?
gay

35) Have you and your #1 done prank calls together?
drunk calls yes

36) Have you ever seen this person dance?
Yes. Yes i have

37) Have you ever seen/heard this person sing?
he has a beautiful voice

38) Do you and this person have a certain saying?
like 6,000

39) Do you know this persons myspace password?
No

40) Do you know who this person likes or who she or he is going out with?
mmmhmmmmm.

41) Have you and this person even gotten into a fight that lasted more than 12 hours?
i have a 45 minute rule

42) Does this person have a dog?
no

43) Does this person go on the computer often?
has to

44) Have you and this person gone clubbing?
mad river

45) Do you know how to make this person feel happy?
talk about how smart he is

46) Do you talk a lot to this person?
i have to or he gets mad cause he's chatty

47) Have you licked this person?
ewno.

48) Has this person yelled at you?
all day everyday

49) Have you and this person got into a fist fight?
yeah! he's a pussy

50) Do you know how much this person weighs?
like 94

Now repost this as:
"Can you answer 50 questions about your # 1 friend?




May 21, 2007 11:34 AM
Flag as Spam or Report Abuse [ ? ]
Subject: RE: "Can you answer 50 questions about your # 1 friend? I'm bored.
Body:
1) What's their name?
linbad marlin

2) Does he/she have a girlfriend/boyfriend?
not anymore ;)

3) Would you go to Disneyland with them?
absolutely

4) How old were you when you first met?
13

5) Has he/she ever tried to hump your leg?
i think so

6) Is this person older then you?
yes

7) When`s the last time you saw this person?
8:41AM

8) When was the last time you talked to them on the phone?
Friday (but i've been trying to call all weekend)

9) Are you related to this person?
no

10) Are you their b/f or g/f?
no

11) Do you have a nickname for each other?
no

12) Do you have pics of this person on your myspace?
no way

13) How many times do you talk to this person?
not as many as i'd like

14) Do you think they will repost this???
they already did (and are gay)

15) Could you live with this person???
not in fishtown

16) Why is this person number one on your top friends?
she whined about it

17) Have you seen this person cry?
almost everyday

18) Do you know this persons middle name?
crystal

19)Have you ever been to the mall with this person?
i don't know

20) Have you ever had a sleepover with this person?
yeah and i punched her

21) If you ever moved away would you miss this person?
i have no soul

22) Have you ever gave this person something?
no, but i took her crappy friendship bracelet and through it on the floor

23) Have you ever done something really stupid or illegal with this person?
all the time

24) Do you know everything about this person?
probably not

25) Does this person have a job?
sort of

26) Does this person have you as their #1?
she needs me

27) Do you think you and your $#1 will be best friends forever?
at least until she moves to fishtown

28) Have you ever made something with this person?
a terrible stop motion animation

29) Have you ever taken myspace pictures with this person?
exclusively

30) Have you and your #1 fought before?
i punched her in the mole

31) Is your #1 on drugs?
yeah, but i wish she'd double up on the zoloft somtimes

32) Does this person drink alcohol?
exclusively

33) Whats your #1's favorite food?
things that are free

34) Have you and your top person made up a hand shake?
double gay

35) Have you and your #1 done prank calls together?
she loves to drunk dial/i love to drunk text

36) Have you ever seen this person dance?
drop down and get your eagle on gurl

37) Have you ever seen/heard this person sing?
only catpower

38) Do you and this person have a certain saying?
grow a pair

39) Do you know this persons myspace password?
maybe

40) Do you know who this person likes or who she or he is going out with?
she's going through a transition - maybe the gelato guy

41) Have you and this person even gotten into a fight that lasted more than 12 hours?
i have a 1 second rule

42) Does this person have a dog?
no

43) Does this person go on the computer often?
she has a blog

44) Have you and this person gone clubbing?
raving, why not?

45) Do you know how to make this person feel happy?
buy her cookies

46) Do you talk a lot to this person?
i'm chatty

47) Have you licked this person?
probably (or at least spit nuts in her face)

48) Has this person yelled at you?
when she's on the rag

49) Have you and this person got into a fist fight?
punched her right in the mole

50) Do you know how much this person weighs?
like 4000

Now repost this as:
"Can you answer 50 questions about your #1 friend?

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Twinziez.


Over the last 7 years, I have been told I look like the following people (two of which dated eachother.) Yesterday an old lady said I reminded her of Rachel Ray...it was the worst day of my life.







Thursday, May 10, 2007

You did not hang out with Carl Sagan


Last night I taped Brother Guy Consolmagno, the Vatican's astronomer, who was lecturing at the museum. What a dick! I'll be working on the podcast this week.

Eric/Jolene get those Wii vids up!