So I had a major meltdown yesterday!
Here's a list of the events that took place:
-I got home and unloaded my computer from the van
-I tried to feed Patches and realized she was gone
-I immediately went into maternal hysteria mode and searched the entire apartment
-I called Ben (en route to Hershey Park) in a panic who told me to check behind the chair
-I hung up
-I instinctively went to the attic calling her name and I could hear her crying but I coudn't figure out where it was coming from
-I stood there in the dark sobbing.
-I became hysterical
-I called Ben back
me-"she's crying I can't find her she's in the floor"
Ben-"calm down. can you hear where the cries are coming from?"
me-"no I can't find her I cant find her I can't where is she PATCHES! oh god. it's dark"
Ben-"breathe. there's a flashlight in the kitchen."
me- "I have to go I have to find her." hangup.
-she was in the far right corner under some rubble.
-I called Ben back to let him know things were okay and Patches and I were sharing a juice on the couch.
I'm menstrating.
Yesterday in my writing class we were given a short excersize. If you had 1 year and a million dollars what film would you make. If you had 3 months and 10,000 dollars what film would you make.
I steered clear of telling my dreams of writing/directing vampire and mermaid movies after I heard my fellow classmates talk about documentaries of the Trans- Siberian Railroad's effect on the surrounding cultures and installation pieces involving timed, filmed sequences of crowds staring at you and decided to go with what I know best. Cakes, the South, tapeworms. I don't know if they were laughing at me or with me. I had had a long day and I'm not a great communicator. My vocabulary is stunted and to help my case, I tend to throw my hands around. (distraction works)
I don't know if you know this but film school at the graduate level is very pretentious.
Self proclaimed "intellectuals" suck for two reasons:
1. "self proclaimed" anything sucks.
2. intellectuals are ugly
We made fun of soaps a lot last night. I couldn't actively participate because I took it personally. I watched a lot of Passions last summer and I think there is something to say about the importance of soaps. Passions is off the chain and those judgemental fools better recognize.
Oh and none of my classmates are ugly. In fact, I think they are all kinda cute. Well... for the most part. I have a detailed description of each personality floating around. I'll send it to you if you care.
Sonali sent me a very serious e mail that said the following:
" Also, you may or may not take this advice but if you can help
it, dont get romantically involved with anyone in the program. someone gave
me this advice and I followed it and boy, am I glad I did. I know others
who didn't know better and I saw first-hand exactly why I was given that
advice. so that's my 2 cents. of course these are matters of the heart and
one doesnt have much control over them...but if you can at all help it,
find someone who doesn't have anything to do with annenberg hall. dont
laugh, i'm serious. if anything goes wrong romantically, it can really
screw up going to school for ya...and after all that you've
accomplished...it would suck to have your whole life topsy turvy. but
again...its just advice and I'm passing it on coz I was glad I got it when
I went to grad school."
I very much like when Sonali types "coz".
I hope she wasn't referring to undergrad (seriously who says undergrad?). I don't think I ever cried in class because Dave was in the bathroom for two hours every night doing god knows what(give him a break he was on a lot of meds for his leg that ultimately constipated him for 4 years) instead of helping me edit and occassionally massaging my butt with his baby hands. (You da Bomb Dave!)
PASSIVE
AGGRESSIVE
Getting boned is the last thing on my list of things to do. FYI. (That's a total lie. It's like #2 after my reaction paper for history and theory.)
What am I doing I have a lot of homework.
